Curse

zehly · Sep 26, 2005, 04:14 PM // 16:14

The Lab Assistant screwed it all up. First, let's go over some figures:

A. [2x] Multi-bandwidth, Multi-Wavelength Diamond-Xenon Laser ($13,400 ea.)
B. [4x] Single-Reflecting High Grade Pure Reflective Mirror ($2,200 ea.)
C. [2x] Reflective Pass-Through 50%/50% Pure Mirror ($4,100 ea.)
D. [4x] Highly Specialized Ambient milli-electron-volt Detector ($7,000 ea.)
E. [1x] 250mL of Pure Lab-Grade Liquid Helium ($1,100 ea.)

Now let's add it up.
A = $13,400 x 2 = $26,800
B = $2,200 x 4 = $8,800
C = $4,100 x 2 = $8,200
D = $7,000 x 4 = $28,000
E = $1,100 x 1 = $1,100
------------------------------
TOTAL! = About $47,700.

Why is this important? Because it's all been destroyed. By who? Technically, it falls under my responsibility, however, given the circumstances, it's not financially my responsibility.

What was I doing? I have waited 2 agonizing months preparing this experiment. We were going to use lasers to energize liquid Helium and detect the ambient amount of "energy" dissipated by it, but not by the lasers themselves. The reason for this test is beyond the scope of my post.

The mirrors are expensive because they are atop a VERY precise instrument that can change their position/angle within one nanometer (1 millionth of a meter).

The detectors are expensive because they can differentiated between the "energy" emitted by Helium, and "energy" emitted by stray photons from the lasers.

The lasers. Ah yes. Very nice instruments. They can be fine tuned for bandwidth (the width of the beam) and wavelength (crudely put, the "color" of the light). Very nice.

So what went wrong? I elected to have a lab assistant control the positioning of the mirrors and the INTENSITY of the laser (how many photons are being released, i.e., how much "energy" is being emitted). I was monitoring the positions/intensity/bandwidth/etc. of the Lasers/Mirrors and keeping track of the results of the experiment. So I was telling him what adjustments to make.

The assistant was some 19yr old egotistic undergraduate physics student know-it-all. He probably said to himself, "This chick is only 20, is a tiny little asian, is a graduate particle physics student, but I know more than she does."

So here's the three things that this little fudgepacker did wrong.
(1) He apparantly doesn't know the difference between "He" and "H". That is to say, the bastard grabbed liquid hydrogen instead.
(2) When I told him to adjust the intensity of the laser, he decided that .5% increase was too little, so he wanted a 5% increase. THAT'S A LOT!
(3) He didn't align the lasers like I told him to.

So here's what happened.
I noticed a misalignment, and therefore, to help track down the culprit, told him to increase the intensity by .5%. He did 5%. I took for granted that he did what I said, and looked at the other monitor, showing the positions of the 6 mirrors. He wasn't aligning them properly.

In this experiment, oxygen may be present because helium isn't "explosive" under these conditions. However, hydrogen is. The hydrogen was in a thinner container. The lasers melted the container. It heated the hydrogen up VERY fast. To simplify what happened next, I can just say that the hydrogen became "combustable" and caused an "explosion."

No one was hurt. Except my pride, seeing that this was a very important process in getting my MASTER'S DEGREE! Now I'll be setback an entire semester. And to boot, I have to explain in writing how the hell this happened. And I'm pretty much writing this poor little guys death warrant, too.

Moral of the story? Don't trust punk ass undergraduate with expensive stuff. Little bastards.

~zehly

P.S. attached is a diagram of the experiment setup.

Count Feanor · Sep 26, 2005, 04:25 PM // 16:25

Damn! I feel like I'm in a science fiction movie. There's nothing wrong with you is there? Any strange symptoms say like... TURNING INTO A GREAT BEAST WHENEVER ENRAGED!!! lol J/K. Trying to lighten the mood. I would be quite pissed too if I was set back a semester because some loser blew up my experiement. Pretty damn cool though.

dreamcrafter · Sep 26, 2005, 04:29 PM // 16:29

sucks to be him, I guess..

Alura Pyro · Sep 26, 2005, 04:31 PM // 16:31

I have a sugestion for you that involves a table him hanging upside down and you supercharging that "LASER BEAM" but that would be just cruel

Blu Vein · Sep 26, 2005, 04:50 PM // 16:50

As much as I will hate myself after this post, I feel that is must be stated. It is your responsibility being the lead researcher to double check all setup and configuration before a test is conducted the good ol' "check twice do once" This is increasingly important if you have people that you feel may not be up to the job or when dealing with expensive equipment that could be lost.

Although I must say now after being so hard on you he probably was thinking it was all a dream I mean with a

Quote:

Originally Posted by zehly

chick is only 20, is a tiny little asian, is a graduate particle physics student

I would think I was dreaming or just really lucky

zehly · Sep 26, 2005, 04:59 PM // 16:59

Quote:

Originally Posted by Blu Vein

As much as I will hate myself after this post, I feel that is must be stated. It is your responsibility being the lead researcher to double check all setup and configuration before a test is conducted the good ol' "check twice do once" This is increasingly important if you have people that you feel may not be up to the job or when dealing with expensive equipment that could be lost.

Although I must say now after being so hard on you he probably was thinking it was all a dream I mean with a
I would think I was dreaming or just really lucky

As lead researcher, I checked what I was feasible. First of all, I am responsible for the laboratory, granted. However, the person who took the position as my lab assistant also takes responsibility with him. He was qualified for operating the equipment. What got in his way was judgement and ignorance. If I'm a doctor and prescribe a medicine to a patient and the nurse gives him the wrong drug, am I resonsible for it? Yes and no. I'm responsible for the patient, however, I am not resposible for the error on the part of the nurse, who has been trained to do her job.

On a side note, I purposely added a wee bit of satire to my story to help my anxiety. But how would you feel if someone blew up your $50,000 BMW?

Sir Skullcrasher · Sep 26, 2005, 05:02 PM // 17:02

Don't worry Zehly, I would pay anything to worked along side a 20 year old, smart, graduate particle physics student!

And $47,000, damn that lots of money to get wasted in 30 minutes!

zehly · Sep 26, 2005, 05:04 PM // 17:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by sir skulkcrasher

Don't worry Zehly, I would pay anything to work along side a 20 year old, smart, a graduate particle physics student!

And $47,000, damn that lots of money to get wasted in 30 minutes!

*smile* Thank you

Sir Skullcrasher · Sep 26, 2005, 05:07 PM // 17:07

so what did your physic teacher say about the experiment? do you have to redo it (i would think yes) and would the school even let you use that much money to attempt this experiment again ( imagine another $50,000 down the drain again in 30 minutes)

Savio · Sep 26, 2005, 05:07 PM // 17:07

I'd pay that much just to mess around with lasers. Be glad I don't actually have $47,700. He and H...lmao, quite a difference.

Count Feanor · Sep 26, 2005, 05:08 PM // 17:08

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alura Pyro

I have a sugestion for you that involves a table him hanging upside down and you supercharging that "LASER BEAM" but that would be just cruel

*Lab assistant straped on table with cutting laser moving closer to crotch*

Lab Assistant: "What do you expect me to do? Apologize?"

Zhely: "No, you loser! I expect you to die! Muahahahahahaha!!!!"

(Anyone know the analogy?)

Xue Yi Liang · Sep 26, 2005, 05:23 PM // 17:23

Quote:

Originally Posted by zehly

(1) He apparantly doesn't know the difference between "He" and "H". That is to say, the bastard grabbed liquid hydrogen instead.

Some people are too stupid to live. WTF is this guy doing in research?

God, that hurts - I'm cringing in my seat just reading this.

(I think it's pretty neat you're doing this at the age of 20 BTW)

It's easy for me to say this in retrospect, but it seemed like a bold move to trust the little f*cker in the first place. I don't mind idiots so much - but the ones who don't ask questions when they're uncertain are intolerable.

Your story is bringing back memories...

I was in physics research in the late 80s making new phases of high temp superconductors at Lawrence Berkeley Labs (yeah - everyone and their grandmother was into this field at the time). I wouldn't let anyone even touch my equipment - let alone some 19 year old punk-ass-know-it-all prick undergrad.

In fact, I was so paranoid I didn't allow anyone to do anything around my equipment. I was crafting differing stoichiometries in an environment of pure oxygen heated to 1000 degrees celsius for 24 hour cycles. Instead of oxygen flow - I wanted to force more oxygen into the crystal lattice so I had to heat my samples in a closed high pressure, high temp environment. I had to have each chamber custom machined from a single bar of a proprietary alloy.

When the lab notified me that they wanted all the windows to be refitted for lexan sheets I went and did it myself. And when they required that there be another wall for protection (in case my gear exploded one night) I went to the hardware store and got the materials to build one myself. It was an ugly-ass wall but I didn't want some joker to be fumbling around near my stuff.

Luckily, in my case, the research was funded by a fella with deep pockets. There were about 3 regular researchers that worked with me but our responsibilities had little overlap. We'd meet every week and collaborate for publications and discussion. My end was the synthesis and nobody touched my stuff. One day we asked our "boss" for a SQUID magnetometer to measure the diamagnetic properties of our samples. Less than a month later there appeared this big-ol crate in the corner of one room. There it was - a $250,000 SQUID magnetometer of our very own.

Sorry for the digression. Your story really sent a chill up my spine (also brought back a lot of memories). Even if you kicked the shit out of that dope it wouldn't be enough. It was excruciating to read. I feel very, very bad for you.

zehly · Sep 26, 2005, 05:52 PM // 17:52

Well, hey, the bastard was assigned to me, and I expect senior researchers to give me--a PAID researched--intelligent people to play with the equipment. Bastards.

Hoyt · Sep 26, 2005, 06:04 PM // 18:04

Quote:

Originally Posted by Count Feanor

*Lab assistant straped on table with cutting laser moving closer to crotch*

Lab Assistant: "What do you expect me to do? Apologize?"

Zhely: "No, you loser! I expect you to die! Muahahahahahaha!!!!"

(Anyone know the analogy?)

zehly:
I have a feeling that you are probably pretty highly regarded in your department.
So, though the situation is a major DOH!, the people that actually matter will probably realize that the fiasco was not of your doing.
Working with a grant program at a university myself, I know that people (Esp. those with PHD in their names) don’t even consider the money they are given real.
And at least your incident was in the course of research and not because some narcissistic know-it-all faculty member plugged in the wrong converter and destroyed a 15k Distance Ed teleconferencing system.
EDIT: Actually your's was much worse. But I do share your pain.

ONECRAZIGUY313 · Sep 26, 2005, 06:26 PM // 18:26

Now that really stinks. Must have "smart" people you can trust to help you or else bad things can happen.

Xue Yi Liang · Sep 26, 2005, 06:30 PM // 18:30

Quote:

Originally Posted by ONECRAZIGUY313

Now that really stinks. Must have "smart" people you can trust to help you or else bad things can happen.

Well, not even that. I'd settle for attentive and "not-dumb."

Honestly, if GW was around when I was in my 20s I probably would have flopped in school.

zehly · Sep 26, 2005, 06:49 PM // 18:49

Does anyone not know the difference between H and He? I mean, c'mon. It's only one proton and one neutron. Why is that so hard to remember. At least I wasn't working with something more dangerous than Hydrogen. Like Radon.

The one good thing is that I know for a fact that the lasers deserve the need to wear a radiation badge.

Sir Skullcrasher · Sep 26, 2005, 07:02 PM // 19:02

I know the difference... guess your lab idiot dont' know it that well! I mean look at the label.. H.. and He! huge differences and different type of chemical.

Alura Pyro · Sep 26, 2005, 07:06 PM // 19:06

Quote:

Originally Posted by sir skulkcrasher

I know the difference... guess your lab idiot dont' know it that well! I mean look at the label.. H.. and He! huge differences and different type of chemical.

and this is said by mr skulkcrasher if he can tell the differance anyone can

zehly · Sep 26, 2005, 07:09 PM // 19:09

Quote:

Originally Posted by Alura Pyro

and this is said by mr skulkcrasher if he can tell the differance anyone can

ROFL!!!

BURN!!

Hehehehe.

In retrospect, the bastard is lucky that all of the hydrogen was vaporized and didn't shoot out like a mist on him. If it did, I'd be using a chisel and a hammer on him..